noun: strategy; plural noun: strategies
- a plan of action or policy designed to achieve a major or overall aim.
"time to develop a good game strategy"
This will be meaty.
Meaty is a word we use to describe something that is involved or complicated.
When researching strategies for calming anxiety attacks, it got meaty. Not because it was complex, but because there are so many good ideas! And so many places to go for good ideas. And things to read. And things to try!
Once we found a strategy, we tried it out and sometimes it worked and sometimes it didn't. And we tried everything.
When researching strategies for calming anxiety attacks, it got meaty. Not because it was complex, but because there are so many good ideas! And so many places to go for good ideas. And things to read. And things to try!
Once we found a strategy, we tried it out and sometimes it worked and sometimes it didn't. And we tried everything.
To review, we researched identifying our feelings as soon as they happen. We looked into how the brain works. We trudged through ways to connect upstairs and downstairs by playing lots of games (it was sooooo hard).
But we still needed to know, how do we stop our brain from freaking out???!
You can read the research on strategies by clicking on Brain Science.
But we still needed to know, how do we stop our brain from freaking out???!
You can read the research on strategies by clicking on Brain Science.
Science has shown that your thoughts lead to feelings and feelings lead to actions. You need to Disrupt your thinking.
Sometimes a disruptor is movement. Sometimes a disruptor is simple, like closing your eyes. Sometimes a disruptor is changing your focus. Or saying what you smell. Or choosing a word that you think is funny and saying it out loud when you start to lose it.
It doesn't matter what you choose. Everyone's disruptor is different.
Sometimes a disruptor is movement. Sometimes a disruptor is simple, like closing your eyes. Sometimes a disruptor is changing your focus. Or saying what you smell. Or choosing a word that you think is funny and saying it out loud when you start to lose it.
It doesn't matter what you choose. Everyone's disruptor is different.
1. Choose a disruptor.
The first thing you have to do is create a disruptor. Draw it, cut it out, cut and paste, or however you like to make art. Choose a naughty disruptor mascot. Carry it around with you. The disruptor will help you refocus.
Speaking of art, there are so many great apps and sites that can give ideas about how to disrupt your thinking. Art is a great way to practice building the staircase and calming down.
We found two types of strategies for disrupting: in the moment and daily practice.
Speaking of art, there are so many great apps and sites that can give ideas about how to disrupt your thinking. Art is a great way to practice building the staircase and calming down.
We found two types of strategies for disrupting: in the moment and daily practice.
A. In the moment
These are things you can do as soon as you start to feel your heart beat faster or whatever your body does when you are anxious.
What your body does In The Moment is your body's reaction to your Thoughts and Feelings. It's part of the circle of Thoughts-Feelings-Actions in Cognitive Behavioral Therapy.
You need to know your Triggers and keep track of what, when, where, why, and how you have anxiety (from Identify).
If you keep track of these things, you can formulate a Plan for yourself. The strategies you choose In The Moment will help you practice being calm in situations that make you anxious.
To truly manage your anxiety, you need Daily Practice, Emotional Regulation, and Reframing so your whole body automatically knows what to do when you're stressed.
These are things you can do as soon as you start to feel your heart beat faster or whatever your body does when you are anxious.
What your body does In The Moment is your body's reaction to your Thoughts and Feelings. It's part of the circle of Thoughts-Feelings-Actions in Cognitive Behavioral Therapy.
You need to know your Triggers and keep track of what, when, where, why, and how you have anxiety (from Identify).
If you keep track of these things, you can formulate a Plan for yourself. The strategies you choose In The Moment will help you practice being calm in situations that make you anxious.
To truly manage your anxiety, you need Daily Practice, Emotional Regulation, and Reframing so your whole body automatically knows what to do when you're stressed.
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B. Daily Practice
Practice makes perfect, so they say. The more you do something, the more likely your body will automatically do it without you trying really hard. Managing anxiety is a little like training for a marathon. You don't just work on one thing and expect to win. You have to work on your diet, speed, distance, strength, and mental motivation. With Daily Practice, you are training the physical reaction in your body. But your body is reacting to your thoughts and feelings and then your thoughts and feelings react to your body. Along with your physical body reactions, you have to address your thoughts through reframing, and your feelings through emotional regulation. Here are ways to train your physical reaction: |
Mindfulness:
Mindfulness is a practice that helps you reflect on your thoughts and actions, and learn to make better choices.
Science shows it's the best way and an essential part of managing your anxiety.
For us, this is hard to do unless it's guided. You can pay for a service like the ones in the link, or find a youtube video or put on Soundscapes (it's on music choice on cable or search "soundscapes music") and read. See some ideas by clicking on the image.
Mindfulness is a practice that helps you reflect on your thoughts and actions, and learn to make better choices.
Science shows it's the best way and an essential part of managing your anxiety.
For us, this is hard to do unless it's guided. You can pay for a service like the ones in the link, or find a youtube video or put on Soundscapes (it's on music choice on cable or search "soundscapes music") and read. See some ideas by clicking on the image.
Exercise:
Exercise makes brain chemicals called endorphins. Endorphins are the brain's feel-good neurotransmitters. You can leave your comfort zone and get active to train your physical reaction.
Exercise can provide stress relief for your body while imitating effects of stress, such as the flight or fight response, and helping your body and its systems practice working together through those effects. See some ideas by clicking on Adventure.
Exercise makes brain chemicals called endorphins. Endorphins are the brain's feel-good neurotransmitters. You can leave your comfort zone and get active to train your physical reaction.
Exercise can provide stress relief for your body while imitating effects of stress, such as the flight or fight response, and helping your body and its systems practice working together through those effects. See some ideas by clicking on Adventure.
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Building the Staircase (Connecting logic to survival):
It's a good thing that when our brain senses danger, we act. It's not a good thing when it's not really a survival situation. How do we train our brains to tell the difference? You can building the staircase from the downstairs brain (survival) to the upstairs brain (logic). Click on the box to learn how. |
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Creativity:
Art and other creative projects are known to help you express your feelings and help you learn more about yourself. The physical feelings of expressing yourself through creativity are the same you get from meditation.
You can explore the things you like and don't like, learn new skills, and maybe make something you can use everyday! Explore Creativity by clicking on the box.
Art and other creative projects are known to help you express your feelings and help you learn more about yourself. The physical feelings of expressing yourself through creativity are the same you get from meditation.
You can explore the things you like and don't like, learn new skills, and maybe make something you can use everyday! Explore Creativity by clicking on the box.
Practice Kindness:
Daily kindness behaviors and involvement with community organizations are important not only because they help you learn empathy, social skills, and responsibility, but also because science shows that you're happier and more calm when you have purpose.
You can get this physical reaction but practicing Kindness. It's also a benchmark competency for social emotional learning. These experiences promote positive relationships and nurture a strong sense of community and social connectedness, which are essential for personal growth. Learn more by clicking on Kindness.
Daily kindness behaviors and involvement with community organizations are important not only because they help you learn empathy, social skills, and responsibility, but also because science shows that you're happier and more calm when you have purpose.
You can get this physical reaction but practicing Kindness. It's also a benchmark competency for social emotional learning. These experiences promote positive relationships and nurture a strong sense of community and social connectedness, which are essential for personal growth. Learn more by clicking on Kindness.
2. Test it out.
You have your disruptor. You have your In the Moment strategy. You have your Reframing, Emotional Regulation and Daily Practice strategies. Now you have to try it out because you need to see if it works.
- Start small. Start with one on one conversation. Ask for help at the library. (With a caregiver) ask for help at the grocery store or post office. Talk to someone you don't know at school. Build up to raising your hand or talking in a group.
- Change it up. Maybe part of your strategy didn't work. That's OK, just try something different. Maybe your strategy needs to be different in different situations.
- Go bigger. Once you feel comfortable, talk in a group. Raise your hand. Approach a group of 2-3 kids on the playground.
- Do what makes you comfortable. Here's a weird thing about social anxiety. A lot of famous people have it because on stage you're a different person. You're playing a role in theater or on screen or on a stage in a band. Mom found that speaking in front of large groups at conferences was easier than starting conversation in a small group, so she did that for her job. Find what works for you and accept your limits.
3. Keep a journal.
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In Identify Feelings, we talked about how important it is to write down feelings, thoughts, and actions. It's also important to write down good feelings.
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4. Figure out how you Deal With It
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Your plan should include training for your Thoughts, Feelings, and Actions: Reframing, Emotional Regulation and Daily Practice.
Once you have your strategies, you can start to practice using them. Start small. Rehearse at home by practicing making conversation or asking a question and actively listening. Once you start to practice, you can see what doesn't work. If you struggle with how you Deal With It, like avoiding or procrastinating, you need to address your Coping Skills. You know when you spend three entire days trying to figure out how to get out of that after school club you promised to go to because there's a bunch of kids you don't know? Or when you just don't do something because it's too hard to figure out but you didn't tell anyone because you hate conflict? That's a negative coping skill: Avoidance. We do this with or without wanting to. This is our way of "dealing with it." Communication skills help you effectively get your message out. They are a part of social skills. Social skills help you interact effectively and harmoniously with others. They are communication skills, active listening, empathy, perspective-taking, cooperation, and conflict resolution. Social skills are essential for building and maintaining positive relationships. If you struggle with what to say and when to say it, you need to work on Communication. For more tips on pulling it all together, click on Plan. |
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