Your peer group is any group of people who can be lumped into a category with you. They can be lumped into your category because of your age, the activities you like to do (gaming, sports, art, music, dance, etc).
Mostly they are kids who are or are around the same age as you. They are important to you because of your need to belong to a group of people who are like you. It's a natural part of being alive. Sometimes being around other kids can create a need to act like others in the group. When we're part of a group, it's electric. That's why having support and a community is so important, especially when you have anxiety. People are pretty fun to be around and we all are just trying to manage our anxiety so we can have fun in groups. You deal with peer pressure every day, and you will continue to throughout your whole life. Learning to recognize negative peer pressure and staying focused on your values and goals will help you avoid negative influences in your life. The group’s behavior may not be good for your own health and well being. For instance, your own individuality can be ‘swallowed’ up by the group, they could get into alcohol or drugs, or you may find yourself under pressure to take part in activities that you do not or would not normally do. This is called negative peer pressure and often results in joining in on group behavior rather than risk being made fun of, getting rejected by the group, or being left out. Positive peer pressure when your peers influence you to do something positive or growth building. Being part of group and working towards a goal is a powerful thing. Friends who get together for studying rather than finding ways to cheat, a group who cheer on working out problems rather than giving up, a group of classmates who love trying new things, working together on a competitive team or on a project like getting food for the animal shelter, reading the same books and talking about them, liking the same music or games and really getting into it are all examples of peer pressure that push you to be a better you. Peer pressure is only a problem when it is negative. It becomes negative when it threatens or conflicts with your values, beliefs, or goals. You'll know when it causes conflict within you and can make you feel powerless and stressed. The conflict is between what others think you should do, and what you know you should do. Dealing with negative peer pressure can be very difficult. Here's how you deal with it:
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Social Anxiety and Peer PressureWe were a little nervous about writing about peer pressure, because it's a tender bit (sensitive subject).
We have social anxiety and we have all gotten into situations that have been bad (lying, stealing, cheating) because we are afraid to let someone down, or quite simply because people with social anxiety are people pleasers. We are afraid to disappoint, we want to self-soothe and don't like the conflict asking requires, In addition, oftentimes our social anxiety appears as rudeness so people think we're rude. That makes it harder to make good friends. We have noticed people with bad intentions have a habit of either knowing we're easily persuaded or assuming we're down to participate in things we feel terrible about later. When you have social anxiety, you have to choose your friends wisely. Just because someone talks to you in a tough situation (in a social situation where you feel uncomfortable) doesn't mean they're a good person. |